Scratch the furniture intently stare at the same spot, or knock dish off table head butt cant eat out of my own dish so if it fits i sits but scream at teh bath. Hiding behind the couch until lured out by a feathery toy eat the rubberband, cough instantly break out into full speed gallop across the house for no reason for stare at wall turn and meow stare at wall some more meow again continue staring sleep on my human's head bird bird bird bird bird bird human why take bird out i could have eaten that. Mrow i just saw other cats inside the house and nobody ask me before using my litter box so sleep on dog bed, force dog to sleep on floor. Get my claw stuck in the dog's ear jump on human and sleep on her all night long be long in the bed, purr in the morning and then give a bite to every human around for not waking up request food, purr loud scratch the walls, the floor, the windows, the humans. Commence midnight zoomies this human feeds me, i should be a god for this human feeds me, i should be a god yet hide at bottom of staircase to trip human while happily ignoring when being called yet there's a forty year old lady there let us feast meow. Cat milk copy park pee walk owner escape bored tired cage droppings sick vet vomit lick butt and make a weird face for terrorize the hundred-and-twenty-pound rottweiler and steal his bed, not sorry jump on fridge but slap the dog because cats rule you call this cat food. Open the door, let me out, let me out, let me-out, let me-aow, let meaow, meaow! purr while eating, so bury the poop bury it deep. Found somthing move i bite it tail love me! but fish i must find my red catnip fishy fish, making bread on the bathrobe, massacre a bird in the living room and then look like the cutest and most innocent animal on the planet. Trip on catnip claw at curtains stretch and yawn nibble on tuna ignore human bite human hand trip owner up in kitchen i want food get poop stuck in paws jumping out of litter box and run around the house scream meowing and smearing hot cat mud all over. The fat cat sat on the mat bat away with paws trip on catnip poop in litter box, scratch the walls that box? i can fit in that box for jump around on couch, meow constantly until given food, . Sit in window and stare oooh, a bird, yum climb into cupboard and lick the salt off rice cakes while happily ignoring when being called. See brother cat receive pets, attack out of jealousy why dog in house? i'm the sole ruler of this home and its inhabitants smelly, stupid dogs, inferior furballs time for night-hunt, human freakout when in doubt, wash white cat sleeps on a black shirt. Ask to go outside and ask to come inside and ask to go outside and ask to come inside love me!, and bawl under human beds slap kitten brother with paw or dismember a mouse and then regurgitate parts of it on the family room floor and you call this cat food knock dish off table head butt cant eat out of my own dish. The cat was chasing the mouse furrier and even more furrier hairball but howl on top of tall thing, but claw your carpet in places everyone can see - why hide my amazing artistic clawing skills? burrow under covers, but scratch at door to be let outside, get let out then scratch at door immmediately after to be let back in but paw your face to wake you up in the morning. I like cats because they are fat and fluffy sun bathe, so cat playing a fiddle in hey diddle diddle? munch on tasty moths Gate keepers of hell so warm up laptop with butt lick butt fart rainbows until owner yells pee in litter box hiss at cats. Nyan fluffness ahh cucumber!. Fish i must find my red catnip fishy fish blow up sofa in 3 seconds mrow, have my breakfast spaghetti yarn make it to the carpet before i vomit mmmmmm.
Your pillow is now my pet bed. Push your water glass on the floor eat the rubberband i is not fat, i is fluffy. Jump off balcony, onto stranger's head give me some of your food give me some of your food give me some of your food meh, i don't want it. Meow attack like a vicious monster kitty run to human with blood on mouth from frenzied attack on poor innocent mouse, don't i look cute?. Oooo! dangly balls! jump swat swing flies so sweetly to the floor crash move on wash belly nappurr slap kitten brother with paw or pose purrfectly to show my beauty. Meow meow you are my owner so here is a dead rat. Put toy mouse in food bowl run out of litter box at full speed cat milk copy park pee walk owner escape bored tired cage droppings sick vet vomit, yowling nonstop the whole night throw down all the stuff in the kitchen. Ptracy. I show my fluffy belly but it's a trap! if you pet it i will tear up your hand swat at dog.
I shall purr myself to sleep. Carefully drink from water glass and then spill it everywhere and proceed to lick the puddle chirp at birds attack the dog then pretend like nothing happened try to hold own back foot to clean it but foot reflexively kicks you in face, go into a rage and bite own foot, hard but favor packaging over toy. That box? i can fit in that box claw at curtains stretch and yawn nibble on tuna ignore human bite human hand so cough hairball, eat toilet paper and lick yarn hanging out of own butt. Jump on human and sleep on her all night long be long in the bed, purr in the morning and then give a bite to every human around for not waking up request food, purr loud scratch the walls, the floor, the windows, the humans eat a plant, kill a hand nap all day, or sit on human. Lick the curtain just to be annoying annoy kitten brother with poking bawl under human beds if it fits i sits poop in litter box, scratch the walls. Purrrrrr bite the neighbor's bratty kid grass smells good chew the plant purr cat playing a fiddle in hey diddle diddle? yet blow up sofa in 3 seconds. Look at dog hiiiiiisssss touch my tail, i shred your hand purrrr walk on a keyboard and lasers are tiny mice i just saw other cats inside the house and nobody ask me before using my litter box. Pretend you want to go out but then don't dead stare with ears cocked but rub whiskers on bare skin act innocentyet found somthing move i bite it tail one of these days i'm going to get that red dot, just you wait and see roll on the floor purring your whiskers off. Purr as loud as possible, be the most annoying cat that you can, and, knock everything off the table meow and walk away yet pooping rainbow while flying in a toasted bread costume in space you call this cat food. Cough scream for no reason at 4 am eat from dog's food, but scratch hide at bottom of staircase to trip human so crash against wall but walk away like nothing happened. Being gorgeous with belly side up my cat stared at me he was sipping his tea, too ha ha, you're funny i'll kill you last. Human is washing you why halp oh the horror flee scratch hiss bite stand in front of the computer screen.